It's been about a week, but I hope your Easter weekend went well and that you all had an enjoyable day either to yourself or with family. I virtually attended service online and attended to devotion Easter Sunday. The days itself leading up to Easter allowed me to be still and grateful for being and breathing in those moments. This past Lent season, I wanted to make a difference in devotion and productivity. Oddly enough, when my personal fast was coming to a close, it seemed more so my fast was being incorporated in my everyday routine. Meaning, it became the norm, so to speak. Forty-days can really make you change, if you allow it to.
Now....hmmm. Okay...this is awkward but, before I continue, allow me to say I did not know the 40-day Lent period was speifically a Catholic adherence, or an adherence for a couple of Christian denominations. I am a Christian. Though I have no specific denominatiion or group, I am a person who is after God's heart and a follower of Christ. When I was a wee-little-girl, I attended Catholic school as a third-grader for 1.5 months. That was over fifteen years ago. And one of the most fasinating lessons I took from religion class was the topic of Lent. And ever since then, I included the practice in my faith from the beginning of March to Easter time.
So here is what people call the twist. Literally seven minutes ago (literally.....I'm looking at my watch), a good friend who I'll call Hermz (hey girl hey), gave me a mini history lesson on Lent. All in all, it makes sense why one would look at me with a confused look on their face when I talk about Lent without including my 1.5months of schooling in St. Thomas Aquinas elementary school, Brooklyn, New York. So, you can say I'm a bit lost, but hey...we learn something new everyday, yeah? Mèsi Hermz. But in the mean time, allow me give my take away from my 40-day Lent priod.
So I decided to let go of a couple of activities this Lent, from limiting my eating out (not wanting to wash dishes will do that), to cutting my 'television' time, I wanted to cultivate a new foundation of moving forward. But one seperation I found to be pretty interetsing was from none other than instagram. It's probably the one platform I give good attention to apart from bloglovin'. I did this both on purpose and with a great intention. I wanted this to be a good thing. And as silly as it sounds, I found this to be oddly difficult. It was harder than I thought for the first couple of days, honestly. I had a screensaver on my phone that read "Don't even think about it" as a reminder to stay away from the app. You could say all I had to do was delete it, but I wanted to be able to have the app on my phone along with the will power to not click on it. And sure, one could argue that I was deliberately tempting myself, now that I think about it. And to that I say, okay, I could respect that- "out of sight, out of mind" right? Except, I didn't see it that way. Again, I've just thought of that rebuttal, so allow me eh.
I wrote it in my planner, my schedule, my bullet journal, everywhere I have some type of scheduling, I wrote it down. Reaching for an app when I'm simple bored was something I really wanted to stop doing. And I have to say, because my mind was in the right place- being intentional and steadfast- it made Lent the more enjoyable. Leaning on my faith gave me a sense of strength I never knew I had. Even by Good Friday, the ending of Lent, I still had no interaction with the app. I felt no need to be constant with it; breaking free from it felt uplifting. It was not until this past Wednesday when I recieved a care package from Yvonne that I chose to login and post my graditude. It was the perfect break to my instagram-fast.
Taking a step back these past weeks has been quite the cleanse for me. I love posting pictures, (though I don't do so often), and I more so enjoy laughing-in-tears from reading the funny memes and watching the short videos. Instagram was a type of 'escape' for me- if you will. Except, it's not the escape I wanted to continue. During this period I was able to face some thoughts and give attention to aspects in my life that I've been brushing under the rug lately. Tough, yes, but necessary. And though she is thousands of miles away, Hermz has helped me tremendously. For that I am grateful. Mèsi zanmi'm (don't even know if I spelled that correctly, girl...but you understand).
It's crazy when you realize how automatic it is for us to go back and check something on social media that we've literally checked seconds ago. Granted, the internet is a powerful tool to use and promote brands these days. So then, perhaps it's because seconds is all it takes for news to change, or for something funny or serious to occur. Literally though, seconds. I can only speak for myself when I say this but...that's a lot of work, energy and time. Heavy emphasis on that last one....Time. An element to take seriously and not be quick to waste.
So, in the end, I was able to answer some questions I had lingering in my mind. Did I feel like I missed something? ...nope. Am I prone to continue clicking on Instagram like a madman?...I think I'm good. Do I still like Instagram? ...Yes, I do. My approach to the social media platform now is different. Taking a step back did not make me dislike Instagram. Instead it's taught me to allow myself to pause with a greater meaning and intention. And I'm grateful that 40-days without it helped me do so.